How long do I have to live in denial before it goes away?

4:13am. The sound of a moving truck rudely interrupts my thoughts, reminding me I haven't slept a wink and a new day was about to begin.

I'm caught between the blur of my laptop screen and thoughts of how my parents would react when I tell them they might have to halt their plans concerning my graduation for another year.

You see, graduating from the university is a big deal where I'm from. Two weeks into the first semester of your final year, and your relatives are telling you the kind of rice they would like to eat at the graduation party.

When you have a family as large as mine, things even get more complicated and critical. The pressure is magnanimous and then you have to worry about the number of people you have to repeat the same story to.

Uncle: Ahh Ifemelu! Shey-bi you would soon graduate? Don't worry, that day I would save the space in my stomuck (stomach) so I can eat plenty rice!

-Their voices are always high pitched with excitement, these relatives.   

Me: Hehe hehehehehe :|

-As time to graduation draws closer, it gets harder to laugh. That's where the story part comes in, and you had better be good at telling it. 

But let me get serious. The only reason I haven't freaked out at the thought is because I silently keep telling myself that it might actually not be true, I might actually graduate this year. My relatives might actually get to eat as many rounds of Jollof rice their stomachs can contain.

I'm not sure I would call it denial, it's more like "don't cause a problem for yourself,with your mouth, when it doesn't exist".
So, I stay positive and optimistic. Those two have gotten me through a lot.

Here's to praying and hoping that this goes away, that it turns out to be a miscalculated guess and I actually have nothing to worry about.